The Secret Books

No one can truely write a book....

No one should read self pitty or reproach into the statement of the majesty of God, who with such exquisite irony granted me books and blindness at one touch.

A man sets himself the task of portraying the world. Over the years he fills a given surface with images of provinces and kingdoms, mountians, bays, ships, island, fish, rooms, insturments, heavenly bodies, horses and people. Shortly before he dies, he discoveres that this patient labyrinth of lines is a drawing of his own face.

A merger of flesh, silence, and the burning of annihilated stagnation...

It's Samhain. It is a time of Death, and the slow removal of the old, to make way for change, and rebirth. It is a time for the Hunt, it is a time for flesh, and blood, and the predatory nature. (Prodigy - [Fire (Edit)]). It is our time. My Steppin' Razor, my Merry Death, my Brothers, (Lucien, Matthew, Jormungand, and more) my Sisters (My MechAngel, my Griffin, my Hel, and more). All the ones i haven't forgotten, and all the ones i'll always know....
Today is our time, my brothers and sisters in hunting... My Pack, if you will. And i would very much like to share it, with all of you, in whatever small ways we can manage... We all have things going on, right now, and we all have the trappings and pit-falls of the Flesh.. Money, housing, drives... Etc.. But today is a day to be grateful for these things. To celebrate them, whichever of them you have. It is a wonderful day to die, if that happens to be in your plans... They'll all be happy to celebrate a transition... cause that's what today is... Transitional day. Meat to Spirit, Fire to Ashes... And that's the way it's supposed to be.
Welcome to Fall.
Today is a day of the Flesh. Eat some. Symbolically, or actually. Eat your lover [...], and declare it a sacrifice. The double entendre runs rampant. Use it, live it, respect it. If that's not your bag, if you don't like the day, or the message, then go out, eat candy, carve a gourd. You're still celebrating, in your own way, if only through the filters, and through the conditioning. Even for keeping us this much in your thoughts, we thank you... *Shows very white, blood-stained teeth* Oh, how we thank you...
I bought myself a steak, today, for religious purposes. I then dedicated it to everyone to whom i thought it should be, asked for well wishes, and best outcomes, and then i cooked it, and ate it. If i trusted it more, or had killed it myself, i would have eaten in raw, but it was from Kroger, so... You know how it goes... Now if i only had a nice blood wine... I guess a Coke'll have to do.
Political Activist type dreams... Drei Stern Rot to blame for that.... I'm going to go check on everyone else.... Oh the days shall be grand, indeed...
Until later..


Hunt well, all. Thank you for the words, brother wolf.

Tonight is the night of the hunt, the feast of the dead begins at dawn. Awake bretheren and rise. It is the time of the shadows again. Night, cold winter, time for the Long Night to come again.

"God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh."
- Voltaire

Metafilter | Comments on 21232

This is so damned strange, I just have to put it up here.

Apocalypse Cow! In the most bizarre collaboration between the American Christian Right and ultraorthodox Jewish Zionists in Israel, Pentecostal minister and Georgia cattle farmer Clyde Lott has collaborated with the Temple Mount Institute of Jerusalem to breed a red heifer suitable for purifying the foundation of a rebuilt version of Solomon's Temple, which ultraorthodox Jews hope will lead to the coming of the Messiah. The problem is that the proposed site for the rebuilt temple is on the same site as the al-Aqsa mosque, the holiest site in Islam after Mecca and Medina. Some Zionist extremists in Israel have attempted to "solve" this problem by plotting to blow up the mosque, which doesn't exactly promote peace in the Middle East. And to think all of this could have been started by a cow that looks like it should have belonged in "the Horse of a Different Color" sequence in the Wizard of Oz!

..... cow of the new order.... four cowboys of the apocolypse....
WHERE'S THE BEEF

Seriously, the whole animal sacrifice thing is sort of the nice part about old testimate jews. Religion of the old days was about blood and power, plain and simple. Metaphorically, at least, the same is true today. Remember? The blood is the Life. There is a reason kosher slaughter involves draining the blood, and not just for health reasons.

Will I live to see the Temple rise again? Perhapse, out of the new shall arise the old... and out of the old, the even older.

Tonight is the End of Summer, the Feast of the Dead. Can you not think of anything more apropreate to be thinking?

Studio Ironcat L.L.C. - Life in Japan



A great little educational web comic, Life in Japan. And dig that hair!

Sick and tired

I used to wonder where I got my anxious personality from, until I started paying attention to my relatives behaviors. For example, this morning, I had a doc apointment at 10:00. I had my alarm set for 9:10, 20 min to leave, 30 min to get there, plenty of time. My mother calls me this morning at 8:30am to wake me up, telling me I should get up and get ready to go to the Doc.It is 3.7 miles from my house to 2001 Peachtree St. Somehow, my mother thought it would take me an hour to go less than 4 miles. Her reason: "its raining, and its Peachtree St." Riiiight.
Needless to say, when I got home from my doc apointment at 10:45, I called her, bitched at her, and then unpluged my phone and went back to sleep until 12:30.
To make matters worse, I'm fighting off some bug, so I'm all fevorish, and my throat hurts like hell. I need sleep. But I willed myself to come to classes today. Why, I don't know, but I did.
Sometimes, sometimes, I'm a glutton for punishment.

The voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses

somewhere i have never travelled, gladly beyond

somewhere i have never travelled, gladly beyond
any experience, your eyes have their silence:
in you most frail gesture are things which enclose me,
or which i cannot touch because they are too near

your slightest look easily will unclose me
though i have closed myself as fingers,
you open always petal by petal myself as Spring opens
(touching skilfully, mysteriously) her first rose

or if your wish be to close me, i and
my life will shut very beautifully, suddenly,
as when the heart of this flower imagines
the snow carefully everywhere descending;

nothing which we are to perceive in this world equals
the power of your intense fragility: whose texture
compels me with the colour of its countries,
rendering death and forever with each breathing

(i do not know what it is about you that closes
and opens; only something in me understands
the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses)
nobody, not even the rain, has such small hands

– e. e. cummings

Pet Problems - II

I was going to get a hamster - a black syrian hamster. I even went down to the store today and looked at them, played with one. I almost bought a cage, but at the last minute didnt. Its a good thing too.

I came home, and talked to my parents about the hamster. My father was going to let me have it. I really think he was. My mother... .my mother said she would nail my door shut and make me pay rent if I brought any kind of animal into the house.

No hamster... no animal at all.

I even had a name for her.... Sadi.

Pet Problems

Ok, so I've been toying with the idea of getting a pet. More than toying with.

At first, considered a snake - my mother doesnt like snakes, and I'm not sure I could really deal with prekilling its food for it.

Then, i considered a gecko - but I wanted something with more personality, and more loving.

Then, I thought, why not get a ferret? They are cute, love me, and are wonderful pets. Erik said no, bad experiences with them when working at a vets office.

Ok, so, what's small, warm, fuzzy, and not a ferret, but still larger than a mouse? A Rat!

Guess what - parents say no to rat, or a mouse.

I'm down to gerbils, hampsters, and guinepigs. *grumbles*

Getting a pet should not be this hard!

The Prior-Art-O-Matic

This is THE MOST ENTERTAINING web site on the internet!

strixus
strixus is a toothbrush that fetches sticks!

ookamiryuu
ookamiryuu is like a normal burger carton, but it turns your lights on and off.

Ness
Ness is like a normal shoe-shiner, but it detects explosives.

Im SO useful!

Session 14


Which CowBoy BeBop Session Are You?

Session 14:
"That's right. Hex is no longer here. Here we merely have an old man that loves games." - Spike
Computer, board, pencil and paper, you are a fan of gaming on all levels.
You own more systems and controllers than you know what to do with.
It's all about enjoyment isn't it?
What's the point of life if you can't enjoy yourself, and you just happen to enjoy the challange of a good game.
Something you enjoy even more than a good game is a good opponent.
Playing against someone who you can spend countless hours lost in a game with would be your soul mate.

Guardian Unlimited Observer | Magazine | You shone like the sun

You shone like the sun

Syd Barrett was the prodigiously talented founder of Pink Floyd, but after just two years at the centre of the 60s psychedelic scene, he suffered a massive breakdown and has lived as a recluse ever since. In this extract from his candid new book, Tim Willis tracks him down and pieces together the story of rock's lost icon


Syd... be well. Some of us still love you.

Sort of Shivery

Sometimes, life just kind of hangs. I have all sorts of work I should be doing, school work mainly, but for the life of me, none of it matters enough for me to work on right now. Going through my head, and playing on winamp, is 'Riders on the Storm', and "House of the Rising Sun" making me feel like I should be sitting in a smokey west coast bar from the '40's, drinking scotch and watching the rain fall.
I have been thinking of that sort ot noir beauty allot lately. Watching rain fall like tears and the smoke rise like a listless snake off the end of a cigarette - maybe it comes from the fact I grew up with the same heros as those children from the 30's and 40's ... the Shadow, and Sam Spade. Now I listen to Rouge's Gallery every night on tape, and dream dreams of flat foot beat cops, gumshoe detectives, and platinum blonds who are both innocent and evil.
There in the world of the PI, good shone through even the filth that covered the underworld he lived in, either from choise or necessity. Making ends meet from case to case, the occasional case which paid for far more than it should, most other cases not paying at all. There is a quiet, beautiful nobility about the noir detective's life.
Perhapse, it is that nobility I am longing for within myself, if not a cigarette and a shot of cheep scotch.

Heaven just isnt high enough

Listening to good music, drinking good whiskey, feeling infinately better.

Hate being sick, sleeping all the damned time. Now I'm doing better. Bought a bottle of Bushmills blend, and am enjoying it emencely. I wanted Jamesons, but the store was out of the year I wanted. Damn it. Things are going very well. Looking forward to Monday strangely.

Rampway forums close this weekend. *pops down another shot* whoo hoo. No more of that shit. To counter that, Ive opened my own, the Oubliette. Heh. Have fun, dear readers.

We are all creatures of flesh, thus we are all flawed: we are all creatures of spirit, thus we are all perfect.

My mantra

This is rich!

atlpunkchick wrote:
Ok--so you're NOT fully attributing your problems to high school bullying?


What I am saying is this -

High school bullies (or bullies of any grade level) will pick the weakest children to pick on. These children are inevetably those which are predisposed to mental disorder to begin with, often those with learning disabilites or irronically, gifted children. Hounded by years of social ostrasicim and abuse by their peers, the weakest of these will develop full blown mental illnesses from their predisposition due to the continual stress.

Not all bullied kids break seriously or dangerously. But many do. Wether it is giving in to depression, and killing themselves, or giving in to psycosis, and following its mad spiral, it is highly unlikely that without social pressure they would have broken such as they did.

Children with special social needs, with special needs of ANY sort, should NOT be forced into the general population of students. The concept of "mainstreaming" does far more damage to special needs children than anything else ever could.

Bullying is NOT acceptable - it is NOT normal or healthy. Most children who try to stand up to bullies end up getting seriously injured as a result. This applies to all levels of education, not just High School.

If you think just because you "tried to help" that automatically makes you better than the people who just stood by, maybe you should ask some of the people you tried to help. I imagine they saw you as only making things worse. I know thats how I felt about those who were trying to "help" me.

But this isnt a point of view you can ever understand. There is no common frame of refference. You think just because you were an "individual" in HS you were an outcast. I imagine there was some guy or girl who always stood back from the croud, watching you and those around you, envying you - wishing with all their heart they could be you. Consider yourself lucky that wish did not turn to envy and hate, or depression and self loathing.

Note to self

Ok, I am not nearly as bad off as that post made me sound. I was upset, but I am doing allot better now.

Mainly, I am rather pissed off about some things going on on the rampway message board. this one in particular.

---

jamesg546 wrote:
strixus wrote:
So they were not the best example. I used it mearly because it was the incedent that most of this generation of students remembers best. And remember something else - the media did everything in their power to cast these children as monsters. It was the only way it could be explained to the general public. But a few of us saw what was happening, looked at each other across classrooms, and nodded sadly, in understanding.

SICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! There is NO EXCUSE WHATSOEVER to murder people... You are sick if you think that someone making fun of you gives you the right to kill them...

---

People are too innocent. They want killers to be monsters, things with four eyes and a mouth full of fangs. Evil having a human face is so hard for the average person to accept. Why? I wish i knew.

But I have no trouble accepting evil wearing a human face. There are no devils, not as sunday school taught us. We all are hiding behind masks of flesh. All the devils of the world.